Friday, November 16, 2012

Unemployment / Disability Debate

With my unemployment ending very soon ( unless there is something I qualify for extension wise I am not aware of ) and not being certain of landing any positions I have applied for, I mentioned to Mike my thoughts on applying for disability. It would take time for such a case to probably even be approved, but if I am not going to receive any more financial buffer aside from the stray commission or Etsy sale I might get here or there ( not enough to live off of currently ), it would be nice to have that as a worst case last resort.

But it turned into an argument of how it would ruin any future chance I have of getting a job.

Would it be better to have NO money coming in except for a handful of commissions once my unemployment ends?  Or wouldn't it be better to actually have $300 or more coming in and still have the ability and option to work part time if I can find something, and even also have the option to go back full time in the future provided I get a stable job offering such?

I hate to admit it, but I am *not* normal in the same sense other employable people are. I have to be realistic, that I am not going to be able to do certain jobs, whether I like it or not. It has *nothing* to do with being lazy, trying to take the easy way out, or making up shit about my health issues. Just because you don't understand it or have never heard of it, doesn't mean it is all in my head and being made up. It is real, and something I have to be reminded of and live with every day.

Just because you enroll for disability aid, doesn't mean you are damned to be dependent on it forever, and I don't want to be. But I do want even some small source of money to try and actually help rather than not be able to help financially at all, while I am still in between jobs and having such a difficult time finding anything.

I don't know what to do anymore. Nothing I do or try seems to be good enough or help.

What else can I do?

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