Ember Crossed Over

A bright new star shines in the sky tonight. Ember crossed the Rainbow Bridge this morning.  We knew she didn't have much longer, but didn't expect it to be so sudden.  She had been improving over the last week, and seemed more like her old self the past few days. She passed peacefully in her sleep at home. March 5th would have been her 14th birthday.  I feel like I didn't do enough for her, compared to all she did for me as my first assistance dog. Ember is in a better place now, no longer in pain.

She will always be with us. Energy cannot be lost. It simply changes forms. Ember dog had a metric ton of energy, the kind that doesn't just cease to exist.  She wanted nothing more than to be as close as she could and make you as happy as she could. Gentle,kind soul. Thank you for everything. We love you. Rest easy now.

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" We'll be alive again in a thousand blades of grass, and a million leaves; we'll be falling in the raindrops and blowing in the fresh breeze; we'll be glittering in the dew under the stars and the moon . . . "                 -  Philip Pullman

Update On Tesla / Service Dog Stuff

I haven't made any updates in a while about Tesla's training progress. Nothing too ground shattering had happened, just working through his adolescent stuff. It was all going fairly well, he was doing well at doctor's appointments and in public, fine in pet stores and anywhere else we went. Bracing well, starting to retrieve objects in public, more challenging scenarios.

But then there was an incident involving a pack of nasty reactive dogs belonging to an irresponsible neighbor of family we visited. They were constantly fence fighting trying to antagonize Ember and Tesla, who ignored them.  At one point the bad dogs started fighting with each other right next to the fence, and because I was near the fence when it happened, Tesla ran toward me and them, to defend me.

I stepped in to stop him, grabbing his collar to hold him back, because the other dogs were small and I was worried he would be blamed for hurting them or of him getting hurt. I lost my balance and used my hand to steady myself on the ground. The most aggressive of those bad dogs pushed through/under the chain fence at that point and nailed my hand while trying to get at Tesla, and the whole thing got Tesla real upset.

I actually ended up having a pain induced syncope episode and passed out after I managed to stumble deliriously inside with partial tunnel vision.  I had to go to the emergency clinic and report the incident. Then went through a horrible experience of having an allergic reaction to the antibiotics they gave me as precaution for the animal bite.

Ever since that happened, Tesla has been reactive to other dogs and more protective in general.  Any time he sees dogs in public, he has outbursts.  I have been working for months trying to re-socialize him, and just when it seems like we have progress, something happens to undo it.

Like the amazing day of Tesla going with me to the hospital for doctor's appointments and radiology stuff. Got all sorts of comments on how well behaved he was, etc. Then we stopped by our local pet store to see friends and get his claws ground, since I was having bad wrist trouble.

He was fine with dogs already behind the counter, peeking over to see them curiously while we waited our turn. A man suddenly comes in despite that I was right against the door and there was clearly no space with big Tesla standing there too. The guy had some sort of Pekinese or similar, and the dog was straining at the leash panting like crazy pulling to get into the salon... right into Tesla's face.  Which triggered an outburst.

It's difficult. I now feel like I am "that person, with that kind of dog".  I have worked with dog reactivity, but none of my own personal dogs have ever been this bad off.

I am at a point now where I don't have much choice but to consider Tesla a washout. Unless I can drastically change the behavior to where it wouldn't be a liability.  I don't have the money for taking him to repeated long term reactive dog classes to try and sort the issue out, and I am not sure it would fix things enough to allow him to ever not have that liability. Unfortunately assistance dogs cannot be reactive in the way he is acting.

He'd be perfect for Schutzhund IPO work.  Which is the next thing we are going to try, to see if putting the reaction under controlled environment and command will help him understand he should not react that way unless asked to do so, and only in the IPO "game" situations. It's sort of like a kid going to karate.  They learn discipline and skills and time and place for using those skills and energy, in controlled environments or situations.

Even with the specific training, there is no guarantee it will work well enough that I can keep working Tesla as my assistance dog. Even with the right training, he probably never will be 100% again.  There might be too much liability if there is even a slight chance he might become reactive at the wrong place and time.  Granted, this could happen with ANY dog, even one who has never shown any reactivity.  They are animals, not machines. At this rate I don't have many options.

I will probably need to get another dog, if by some miracle I can't make Tesla work out. I run into the same problem as before.  As much as I want to keep Tesla and I am really attached to him, I don't really have the financial means to keep 3 large dogs ( Ember, Tesla, and whoever new dog is ) if I do need to start all over again and get another dog.  Especially since we'd be looking at a larger breed like a mastiff type dog. I'm just not sure I can try owner training again,between the financial and emotional strain. Raising these dogs from tiny pups and then them being perfect except for some random fluke reason, too much emotional hurt in it and feeling like a failure when I have been forced to rehome them.

I am still on CPL's waiting list, but have not heard anything back besides forms to update my information periodically.  I am not hopeful I will hear anything anytime soon.

I am at a point where I am ready to give up if this working dog training doesn't work.  Maybe I'll just become a hermit and not leave the house anymore.

This week starts the Schutzhund IPO training with someone I was introduced to who has experience with police K-9s and military working dogs. He is familiar with the most high drive of working dog lines, which will be a valuable asset in trying to reshape Tesla's behavior.

Fingers crossed this will all somehow work out. I will post more updates along the way.  Positive thoughts for us are greatly appreciated.

Tesla's Birthday

Tesla is 1 year old today.  Happy birthday, you fuzzy dork!

In Boxes, Crafty Things, Dogs

In Boxes
So busy.  Driving back and forth to Texas, trying to find the energies and lack of pain to sort and pack up more things.  Helped Mike get settled in to the new place. Things didn't go the way we originally planned; when do they ever?  Lack of Uhaul Northeast side meant all of our belongings and furniture that was at his grandmother's ended up having to stay there.  Which meant he only came with what he could cram and Tetris into his car, most of that room being taken up by his work computers and chair and work necessities, and a handful of other stuff he could jam in.  So once again we started with nothing and had to get new furniture and things, with the hope his family will go and take pictures of the stuff we left and sell it so we can get some money back for it, but the likelihood of that happening anytime soon is slim. Lots of stress, the move almost not happening because Mike's pay drops so drastically from the supposed "cost of living" difference. Which is horrible that companies can do it and base it however the hell they base it off local rent costs or whatever, because when you base it off a city that has reduced prices because of the nearby military base then of course that might be cheaper - only if you live on the base and have access to the reduced base prices. But the rent isn't. And milk and other things still cost as much when you are on civilian side.  It's disgusting that by relocating to get closer to work, it basically set him back to his beginning pay rate, removing 3yrs or so worth of raises and a promotion to a higher position.  But job opportunities and affordability long term is better, so it was worth doing. It just means things are going to be insanely tight for a while.

Crafty Things

I have all sorts of things going on and in the process of being completed art and creativity wise and with related efforts. The ceramic rattles are completed, but they were one of the first things I moved via car to ensure they wouldn't be damaged. I will get pictures of them next trip and get them posted online for sale, though I might ask Mike to take a few teaser shots of them I will share via Patreon for anyone interested in catching them before they are released to the general public.  Most of my art supplies are going to be packed away until they can be relocated, but I will try to keep out some basic things like a sketchbook, my Wacom for digital, and maybe a few other odds or ends. All of my corals are doing well.  I have finally grown some out enough to where I can frag them, and plan to have those frags up for sale when I do.  Moving the tank and its inhabitants is going to be all sorts of insanity, but I already have it planned out and hope to document the process and share it later.  I have been prepping plants for bonsai and doing my annual collection of flowers for drying. The Sweet Olive and Gardenia smell so wonderful.  I have a few ceramics items that are glazed but not yet fired, so I really need to run the kiln and fire them before they get packed for travel.  Making of new items is on hold for the moment.

Dogs

Ember stayed with Mike so I could focus more on working with Tesla individually, similar to how I did back with Journey.  Training has been a little slow going with all of the other crazyness going around, and my body having an absolute fit. My ankle has been messed up over a month now, making it painful and hard to walk.  Poor Ember was getting to a point where I was having to give her more medicine when she was more active going places with me, and it was clearly effecting her behavior and her ability to alert accurately, to where I decided it was in her best interest not to work her anymore.  As a DDR line descendant GSD, Tesla is a very high drive dog, and far more challenging to work with.  I'm still not completely certain he has the correct behavior for assistance dog work.  He'd be excellent for Schutzhund and IPO activities without a doubt. In fact, I have been in contact with a local Schutzhund club and we went out this weekend to meet some of them and see them work their dogs.  Tesla even got to become acquainted with some nosework for tracking. Tesla is insanely strong for his size, and he has a beautiful bite and grip when engaged in play.  It's just honing in the focus and building the self control over those instincts, and helping build his "on/off" switch that might prove to be an issue. He is a puppy though, so I am hoping I can shape it and use that drive to our advantage, in a controlled fashion that will make him the best working dog he can be.

Going back to the topic of size, that is really the only other concern I have with Tesla. I am not sure if he will be big enough.  His growing rate is more closely resembling Chakotay's, which was on the smaller side for a male Shepherd.  Journey was huge by this age, but he also had obvious physical issues as a result despite my best efforts to do everything right to ensure physical soundness.  You just can't beat genetics.  Still, at 4 months old ( going on 5 ), I feel like even Chakotay was larger by this point.  But it could just be that I am so worried about if Tesla will work out or not after Journey and Chakotay washing out, that my mind is playing tricks on me.  We went in for Tesla's last round of puppy shots/ rabies vaccine. I discussed it with the vet. With his current rate of growth, unless he hits a huge growth spurt, she isn't sure he will be more than 60lbs.  He is a very strong little dog, even now.  But I need the size. He needs to be tall enough for full mobility assist and have a sound structure for the weight bearing support work and counter balancing.  Once again I am not sure how this will play out.  If he ends up being too small, I might not be able to use him, even if he is physically sound otherwise. Ideally a person my size should have a dog no less than 80lbs, preferably 100lbs+ for the mobility assist I require. With Ember, I fudged a lot and always used an additional surface/wall/furniture/whateve

r so I didn't hurt her.  Now I am to the point where I can't do that anymore, even if Ember was still young and workable, my body just can't tolerate as much as it used to. I need a larger dog.  I am really hoping Tesla will be that dog.

Meet Tesla

This is Tesla.  His registered name is Tesla Leuchtet Den Weg vom LhunThyla ( Tesla Lights The Way - from LhunThyla ; my owner/kennel tag ).

Tesla is an AKC registered German Shepherd ( Alsatian ).  He is 13 weeks old.  I have had him for about a week, but didn't want to post anything publicly till I knew for sure I was keeping him.  He is a Galliard, born Waxing Gibbous ( a day shy of Ahroun! ) . Very vocal and likes to tell you about all the things.  He has a great personality and is already more like Journey was in his confidence levels, which is a good thing. Certain personality traits about Tesla remind me of Journey and Chakotay both.

Tesla's namesake is in honor of Nikola Tesla, famous Serbian-American inventor, electrical engineer, mechanical engineer, physicist, and futurist who is best known for his contributions to the design of the modern alternating current electricity system, wireless communications, experiments in wireless power transmission, and much more.  Tesla coils, anyone? :D

The symbology behind "lighting the way" is both toward that namesake, and the hope he will light the way for me as my new service dog.  So far he is doing well with basic training and everything he is exposed to in public.  His hips and body structure look great; he does the "Superman sprawl" which is an early sign hips should be okay.

When I went to meet him and was doing the initial evaluation, he was quite the character.  While talking to the breeder, I set my treat pouch down off to the side. Next thing we knew, puppy had picked the whole thing up and was happily trotting back toward the garage carrying it!  A metal trash lid dropping right behind him when he wasn't expecting it and umbrella/object testing did not phase him, he had quick recovery. He happily greets strangers and other dogs.

As long as the OFA xrays come back good, he will be clear medically.  As long as he can overcome any adolescent fear periods he might have, he should be okay behaviorally.  Fingers crossed he will be the one.  Third GSD is a charm?  Lets hope so.

I will be setting up a fundraiser to help cover his medical and xray expenses, and so we can get into some training classes for socialization as soon as possible.  Anyone interested in donating can send donations to leopardwolf@gmail.com  via PayPal.  I am offering artwork or creative things in return, based on donation amounts for anyone interested.  Thank you for your help and support!





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